‘You speak English?’ you say.
‘Of course I do’ he says
‘ Don’t you know who I am or should I say who I used to be, I was once the once and future king of England, my twin brother was taken from me at birth and I was lead to the tower and have been imprisoned in an iron mask for the last sixty year, it was only in the last few weeks that these heroes came along and freed my from this hellhole, thus it were that we have sailed away for a year and a day and have finally reached this land where the billabong tree grows, so too long have I tarried, yes let us marry, but what shall we do for a ring, a ring, O what shall we do for a fing they came from the north with fire in their eyes, not that I can see you understand, anyway I gave them my gold chain of office that holds the seal of the prince regent in the form of a cross, the only thing that will prove that indeed I am what I say I am and not anything else, they left me with this piece of paper which they said was a magic map and would relieve where the treasure is, not that I need treasure you understand for I am the once and future king don’t you believe it, what they say is true, they are coming back soon I hope, it was only a couple of days ago, if I could see I would look at the map and finds them now, anyway you got any cash I kinda need some silver for a bet I made with a magpie?’
Do you:-
Run him through with your sword